TALLINN - If you've walked down Pikk Street any time in the past few days, it's safe to say that you already know about Tallinn's latest culinary import. With a Greek flag flying proudly over the door, a mannequin in full national costume ready to greet you and a bright, blue sign cheerfully offering "Traditional Greek Souvlaki," Artemis is certainly not trying to be coy.
Souvlaki, for those of us who can't seem to get any closer to southern Europe than Parnu, is a dish that's sometimes referred to as "the hamburger of Greece." Not that it comes anywhere close to a Big Mac. Souvlaki are actually delicate skewers of meat that, like the Hamburger in America, are fast, cheap and pretty much everywhere.
I popped in to see what this little cafe was all about, and at first glance, found pretty much what I expected. The cafe is just that, a cafe - small, bright and fairly informal, with eight simple tables for no-nonsense eating. In dinner party fashion, little placards name each table after a Greek island, while Mediterranean pipe tunes add to the ambience. If the menu looks as recognizeable as a slate of hieroglyphics, you can turn to the back wall's large, color pictures for guidance. The dish choices consist mostly of chicken or pork souvlaki, with or without pita, and four types of salads.
My biggest surprise came in finding real, honest-to-goodness Greeks. It turns out that Artemis is run by two guys who, for what must be very good reasons, decided to give up the Mediterranean climate and open up a business here. This shot of authenticity was definitely a refreshing change. Anyone who has been in Tallinn long enough will know that most ethnic restaurants in this class are run by a mobile-phone-wielding guy called Seryozha, who tries to pass off shashlyk with raisins as an exotic Oriental delicacy.
After a friendly chat with the proprietor - something that would never happen with Seryozha - I opted for the grilled feta. On the surface, a piece of cheese wrapped in aluminum foil doesn't sound too exciting, but this was spicy, tangy and pleasantly stuck to my ribs.
A few days later I dragged a friend back to the cafe with me. The experience was somewhat different. By now, word was out, and the place was getting crowded. An atmosphere of frantic activity seemed to reign behind the counter, where three young waitresses were jockeying for a position. Every so often one of the Greeks would poke his head out of the kitchen to deliver a take-away order. One waitress recommended a certain chicken dish. Ten seconds later, when my friend ordered it, the same woman inexplicably informed us that they were out.
I asked for the same grilled feta, which at 55kr (3.5 euros), was one of the more expensive choices. My friend had the pork souvlaki in a pita for 35kr, and she was frankly not very impressed. "I could have made this at home," she claimed, showing me a pita in which the cook had apparently tried to fit the equivalent of a whole onion. She also pointed out something that I had missed, namely that the portions here, while cheap, are more snack-sized than meal-sized.
The bottom line: Artemis is fine for what it is, and if you're looking for a simple, fast, cheap place to eat that's more interesting than the standard cafe grub, you've found it. But just don't expect anything fancy. And if you're hungry, consider ordering two dishes.
