THINKING CAPS: Sometimes the wisest gift choice is something completely useless and silly, like a pointy, felt hat.
TALLINN - As Christmas Eve approaches and SMS loan providers rub their little hands together, we are all left to wonder what to give to those multitudes of friends and family members for Christmas. They already have everything they need, so what sort of a gift would make their Christmas this year special?
If you're like me, you'll probably have a panicked run around the shops just before the Christmas dinner. You'll have already dismissed the woolly jumpers and the socks that granny used to love to give.
I've always found that one way of getting around the bothersome question of what to give to the person who has everything is to give them something silly and utterly pointless. Like a tie that blinks and sings Christmas carols. Or a mug 's you can always do with a mug. Or that wicker star thing you saw on the Christmas market 's we all need one of those don't we?
You can always go for the classic elf figurine you saw in that little souvenir shop on Town Hall Square. Show me one person who would be bold enough to tell you they hate it.
And as if that wasn't enough 's you now have to buy a present for mommy's Chihuahua. I wonder which doggy bone tastes better?
Whatever you choose to go for, you'll now have to wrap it ... in multitudes of humorous or pretty wrapping paper.
Whoever thought of wrapping paper?
Wrapping paper was only thought up as a new way of torture. After having run around the shops for hours on end and finally finding that one thing you think the person would really like for some particular reason, you're now left with the task of having to make it look pretty while wrapped in paper, whatever its shape. Ever tried wrapping a 2 meter giraffe toy? If you have, you should get a medal.
So there you are 's covered in tape, paper and the mysterious frilly things that go on presents, trying to figure out how to make it all look presentable. Oh sure, you could go the easy way and just get a bag. But you wanted to make it special, didn't you?
Of course, you think with that 20- 20 hindsight, you could have always let the lady at the gift wrapping counter pack it for you. If only you would have been patient enough to wait for a half an hour in the queue whilst listening to the cheerful sounds of mothers telling their children to stop whining.
And then you make it to the dinner. Now if this was England you would be welcomed by a poor, old, half-blind grampa who has had too much Christmas cheer. But you are in the Baltic states. We don't do Christmas cheer here 's we do Christmas glum.
There is one, classic escape from all this. You could put all that money you have saved for Christmas presents to good use and buy yourself a package holiday. Run away somewhere warm and switch your phone off.