Welcome to Parnu, Finland

Dec 03, 2008
By Justin Petrone

TARTU - And so it came to pass that I was given time off. Weary of flying, I hoped to spend it within the borders of the Republic of Estonia. All I wanted was to get away to the west coast of Eesti, where I could indulge in saunas and swimming pools and maybe get a massage.
While the major spa destinations of Saaremaa seemed like the immediate target, like true mainlanders my wife and I settled on Parnu instead. Parnu, population 44,000, is the fifth largest city in Estonia, located on the country’s southwest coast. It’s also the “summer capital” of Estonia, which made our choice of visiting during the first major blizzard of the year somewhat unique.

We pulled into Parnu at night in the snow, and headed to Tervise Paradiis – “Health paradise” – a modern-looking spa right on the beach that hosts a casino, bowling alley, and claims the “largest water park in Estonia.” Five flag poles in front held aloft the banners of the hotel, the EU, and Estonia, Sweden, and Finland.
The interior design of Tervise Paradiis seemed to adhere to the aesthetics of the Nordic tourist: futuristic metallic furniture, wood-laminate hotel-room flooring, and Bossa Nova elevator music. I couldn’t find an Estonian Bible in our hotel room, though there was a copy of the Uusi Testament in Finnish.
The next day, I got my long awaited massage. It did the trick and hurt a bit too. Writing for a living kills your back. You pray for the day when you get to lay flat in a room with Eastern meditation music on and a silent masseuse by your side kneading her elbows into your spine.

After breakfast we moved from our Scandinavian-like cocoon at Tervise Paradiis to the SPA Estonia down the street. From the window in our new spa we could look out on the snow-covered roofs of downtown Parnu. Architecturally, Parnu is a treat. The streets offer up curiosity after curiosity. There are at least two really nice churches, the Lutheran St. Elizabeth’s and the Orthodox St. Catherine’s. A walk down the main downtown artery, Ruutli Street, is recommended.

SPA Estonia had an extensive swimming area with a variety of saunas, including a “salt sauna,” where one spreads handfuls of salt all over their body to facilitate the discharge of toxins from the skin. In the changing room for the bathing area of SPA Estonia, I was greeted by an older gentleman who began speaking to me in a language that sounded like someone had loaded Estonian sentences into an open blender. From the various bits and pieces that spurted forth, a mosaic containing meaning could be constructed. He had gone somewhere. A sauna. Something about women.

He then tried communicating with an Estonian guy in the room who told him directly that he didn’t understand. But Finns, the nationality of which I later determined the gentleman to be, are a stubborn sort, and they insist in speaking their own language in their little brother country. He just kept at it, and sooner or later the Estonian guy figured out what he was talking about and told him something I didn’t understand and the Finnish gentleman disappeared into the showers.

“What language was he speaking?” I asked the Estonian guy for confirmation. “Finnish,” he shook his head in response. “Yeah, I thought he was speaking some really weird Estonian.” The Estonian said, “No kidding.”
Then the unbelievable happened. Another Estonian guy came in and they had a conversation. Two Estonian guys having a conversation in a Parnu spa; imagine that.
It then dawned on me that a minority need not actually be a resident to influence the psychology of a city. The steady flow of tourists from Finland meant that any given time of the year Finns were a de facto minority in Parnu. This explained why not only the spas made sure to create a linguistic environment in reaction to this reality, but even some signs in downtown Parnu were in Finnish. “Tervetuloa Parnuun,” I thought to myself. “Welcome to Parnu.” See, even I was picking it up.


http://www.terviseparadiis.ee
http://www.spaestonia.ee

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